Maarten, don't try to be impressive, just try to be.

So what does it mean to give? And how do you give without wanting something back?

When I started this month I had the idea of doing something similar as in April, to give in many different creative ways. Every day something else and to someone else, preferably to people I don't know. And that it had to be relatively noticeable things, nothing huge, but relatively big, something you could tell somebody else about and it would be a story. Facebookable, likable, retweetable.

But then I realized two things.

First, this felt like the wrong intention. I shouldn't give in order to get the followers of the project to like it, I want to give to people who need it and can use it! It being liked has no function there.

Second thing I realized: I am tired (yes, I have to admit it!) and didn't have the energy to do this month like I wanted to. And when I tried I didn't give without wanting something back, because what I wanted back was the relief of having done my 'duty' of the day. I wasn't actually experiencing giving, I was experiencing tiredness, stress and a feeling of discontent with myself. Because I felt that what I was giving wasn't enough and I didn't know when it would be.

Change!!!!

Isn't it all about the little things? Didn't I discover that many times before this year? Why would it be any different now? If I want to experience giving, maybe I have to do every action with the idea of giving in my head. Not trying to get anything out of anything, just letting it be and giving it attention. So then all of a sudden I ended up talking with the cashier about her pain in her eye and she seems to enjoy talking about it, I gave compliments to the the cook for the great food, I gave lots of smiles to everybody on the street, I gave advise to someone who asked for it. And it all felt great!

And then I realized what I want to do. This month I want to be the most generous person I can possibly be. I want to be Ghandi, Mandela and Jesus combined (you're probably laughing, I know, maybe a little ambitious, but hey, gotta have goals! :-). What I mean is, I want to be giving, and with that I'll give.

Is this all a little bit to vague? Well, practically I figured I could offer my services to anybody who needs them. So what are the things I'm good at and who can I help with that? I made a little google docs document, with all I have to offer and people can contact me if they have requests. For instance, today I helped someone install wordpress on their server and tomorrow I'll meet someone to give advice about building a website as well. (Nobody requested a 'Dancing for people who normally need to be drunk to dance' workshop yet :-() But later this week I'll do some physical work, building a wooden floor. Fun!

The moral of this story? Small is good and give what you have. Don't try to be impressive, just try to be.